Writing off your worries...
Updated: Nov 5, 2020
Sometimes it can feel like all our thoughts are just swimming around (crashing around?) in our head..
It can feel overwhelming and we might feel like we can't deal with any of it.
Some of this thoughts might be about our to do list, what needs to be done today, yesterday or in the next 6 months...
Some might be worries about relationships, friendships about how other people are dealing with things...
It might be about things we have not told about anyone...this symptoms that we googled in the middle of the night, worries about what's going on in our mind, in our life , in our bodies...
All those thoughts can easily feel like a big bowl of messy, like a messy ball of wool that we can't untangle because we can't find where to start; so we might start to poke it until we give up and want to throw it or hide away.
When things get messy, for example in a cupboard, what I like to do is to take everything out. Once it is all out, I can then look at it, decide if I still need it, discard or fold away until I need it.
And we can do the same things we our thoughts and worries.
We could use to-do lists but they can become overwhelming and guilt inducing if we feel that we are failing to tick things off. What might be helpful with to do list is to choose between a daily one but with small achievable goal, breaking up bigger ones. So if the plan is to redecorate the bedroom, today to-do might be to tidy up the room, tomorrow choose the paint, etc...
Or we could work with a longer term one, so for example for November my objective will be to have the room ready for painting.
The choice will depend on how you work best, with a daily goal (maybe you work well with deadline) or a monthly one (slowly getting to goal).
But the to-do list might not take in all our thoughts, so want do we do with the other ones?
One things, I often use is a "brain dump", writing down all those random and not so random thoughts that are in my head. I have drawn this picture of a face with bubble as I felt it worked well for me to have a multitude of spaces...
If you would like to use the "what's in your head ? ", PDF copy are available to download at the bottom of the page: one representing a woman, one a man and one non gender specific or if you want to add you own feature so that it looks more like you.
How to use it:
Try to give yourself a few minute somewhere calmer to do it.
Trying not to think about it too much, write down all of the things that are coming up in your head without censoring them (can't write that it's silly, or this is not that important..).
Once it is all there, the next step could be to look at them one by one and to ask yourself:
- Can I control this?
- Can someone help with this?
- Can I talk to someone about it?
- keep or dump?
After doing the exercise, decide if some of it can be put on the to do list, who can you talk to safely about it and what can be taken away as it is not needed.
If you need more support with your thoughts and your worries, don't hesitate to get in touch here to see how I could support you.